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  • 31. "51% of you wants to get better, and 49% of you wants to keep using"
    2025/07/25

    In this episode of the Wet Dreamz Podcast, host Jose Gonzalez and guest Dr. Brad Hinman dive into Step 4 of their eight-step recovery model: defining the real problem behind compulsive sexual behaviors like porn use. They emphasize that while porn might seem like the core issue, it’s actually a symptom of deeper emotional needs—such as a lack of affirmation, respect, or validation—that aren’t being met in healthy ways. The conversation explores how therapists help clients uncover these underlying issues by looking for themes in their personal histories and recurring emotional patterns. Jose and Dr. Hinman share insights on the challenges men face in identifying their “why,” including resistance to change, never having reflected on their motivations before, and societal habits of compartmentalizing problems. The episode ends with practical advice for those struggling to define their core issues, encouraging gentle self-reflection and curiosity to find healthier coping mechanisms rather than relying on porn or other destructive habits.


    Eight Step Model viewable PDF

    https://shorturl.at/MDJUC


    Timestamps:

    00:00 "Defining the Problem: Step 4"

    06:27 Identifying and Addressing Needs

    07:08 Life's Bird's Eye View Insights

    11:43 Resistance to Change

    15:49 Identifying Roots of Conflict

    18:35 Reflect on Past to Heal Future

    22:34 "Understanding and Disassembling Coping Mechanisms"

    24:57 Overcoming Negative Behaviors

    27:09 Personalized Coping Mechanism Discovery

    33:41 Introspective Coping Without Unhealthy Habits

    36:04 "Be Your Own Detective"

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    38 分
  • 30. "90% of what we worry about isn't true": What Really Happens in Your First Sex Therapy Session
    2025/07/12

    In this episode of the Wet Dreamz Podcast, host Jose Gonzalez and guest Dr. Brad Hinman break down what to expect during your first visit to a sex therapist. They discuss common anxieties and misconceptions—like embarrassment, fear of judgment, or not knowing what sex therapists actually do—and reassure listeners that sex therapy is professional, confidential, and supportive.

    The conversation covers what typically happens in a first session (mostly talking, no physical exams!), the range of issues sex therapists help with (from desire differences and dysfunction to infidelity and sexual identity concerns), and practical tips on how to prepare. Above all, they encourage listeners to feel comfortable seeking help early and highlight the importance of honesty, openness, and humor in the therapeutic process.

    Timestamps

    00:00 First Sex Therapy Visit Guide

    04:59 Lack of Sex Therapy Education

    07:03 Talking Openly About Sex

    12:41 Therapy Avoidance Phenomenon

    15:07 Confidentiality and Honesty Encouraged

    18:16 Problem Identification and Solutions Collaboration

    20:32 Unique Challenges in Sex Therapy

    25:08 Misconceptions About Sex Therapy

    27:09 Define Therapy Goals

    32:18 Restoring Lightness in Relationships

    33:18 Lightening Awkward Conversations

    38:06 Sex Therapy Insurance Coverage

    42:07 Detached Perspective on Sex Therapy

    43:20 "Wet Dreams Podcast Disclaimer"

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    44 分
  • 29. "You're pressing the nuclear button": Divorce, Sex, and Self-Esteem
    2025/06/27

    In this episode of the Wet Dreamz Podcast, Jose and Brad get real about divorce—how messy, confusing, and emotionally tough it can be, especially for guys. They talk about everything from couples using divorce as a threat, to the weird “should we/shouldn’t we?” dynamic around sex during and after splitting up. The hosts dive into how divorce can seriously mess with a guy's sexual confidence, self-worth, and even lead to things like erectile dysfunction, especially when jumping into new relationships too soon.

    They also tackle the myth of staying together “for the kids” (spoiler: the kids almost always know what's up), and remind listeners that it’s way more important to work on yourself, figure out what went wrong, and give yourself time before diving into something new. There’s a lot of honesty here—about heartbreak, confusion, and healing—and the big message is: don’t go it alone. Therapy, reflection, and reaching out for support can make a massive difference when you’re picking up the pieces after a divorce. If you’re in the thick of it or just coming out the other side, this episode is a comforting, no-judgment look at how to move forward with a little more clarity and self-compassion.

    Timestamps

    00:00 "Divorce and Sexual Health"

    06:18 Sex During Imminent Divorce

    07:44 Confusing Intimacy and Relationship Status

    13:03 Divorce: Men's Sexual Self-Esteem

    16:14 Sex, Relationships, and Emotional Confusion

    18:40 Misconceptions After Relationships End

    20:53 Fear of Vulnerability and Intimacy

    23:40 "Double Heartbreak Reflection"

    28:49 "Relationships Complicated by Kids"

    32:40 Kids Sense Troubled Relationships

    34:56 Triggers in New Relationships

    37:30 Post-Divorce Therapy Guidance

    40:21 Divorce and Sexual Health Strategies

    43:42 Self-Reflection for Personal Growth

    47:53 "Growth Through Divorce Challenges"

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    50 分
  • 28. "Men are ready for sex much quicker...it doesn't mean that they want to": Men's Libido
    2025/06/13

    In this episode of the Wet Dreamz Podcast, host Jose Gonzalez and guest Dr. Brad Hinman dive into the topic of men experiencing lower libido than their partners—an issue they note is more common than people might think. They discuss the emotional challenges men face, such as feelings of shame, fear of rejection, and worries about not living up to societal expectations regarding masculinity and sexual desire. The conversation covers various factors that can impact male libido, including stress, mental health, medications, sleep habits, and relationship dynamics.

    Jose and Dr. Hinman also explore how comparison—whether through social media, friends, or unrealistic cultural narratives—can create added pressure and dissatisfaction. They tackle the misconception that men should always be ready for sex and highlight the importance of open communication between partners. The episode concludes with practical advice for men, emphasizing the value of emotional connection, taking personal responsibility for one’s sexual experiences, and seeking support when needed.

    Whether you’ve found yourself questioning your own libido or are supporting a partner through this experience, this episode offers validation, insight, and actionable tips for navigating sexual desire and fostering healthier relationships.

    Timestamps

    00:00 Addressing Lower Male Libido

    03:47 Male Compartmentalization Myth

    07:33 "Stress, Sex, and Personal Relief"

    11:17 Rejection Anxiety in Relationships

    15:56 Newness vs. Monotony in Desire

    19:08 Porn, Masturbation, and Sexual Desire

    22:43 "Importance of Open Communication"

    25:35 Enhancing Desire Through Connection

    26:43 Owning Your Sexual Desire

    31:51 Wet Dreams Podcast Disclaimer

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    32 分
  • 27. "It wasn't this random surge of p*rn in your brain, there's reasons"
    2025/05/30

    In this episode of the Wet Dreamz Podcast, host Jose Gonzalez and guest Dr. Brad Hinman discuss STEP 3 of their eight-step recovery model for addressing out-of-control sexual behavior—"Progression." Building on previous steps (creating distance from the behavior and examining sexual history), they dive into understanding the ups and downs of sexual behavior over time. They explore why it's crucial to identify periods of high and low use, examine what circumstances contributed to those patterns, and discuss the importance of recognizing escalation or tolerance in behavior. The conversation highlights the value of looking beyond surface-level triggers to understand the underlying reasons and needs driving the behavior, while also emphasizing the importance of focusing on healthy coping mechanisms and not falling into shame. The episode is practical, encouraging listeners to reflect deeply on their own patterns and to recognize hope and personal agency in their recovery process.

    Eight Step Model viewable PDF⁠⁠

    https://shorturl.at/MDJUC


    Timestamps

    00:00 Behavioral Reset and History Analysis

    03:58 Addiction: Understanding Progression

    08:20 "Internal vs. External Influences"

    10:18 "Coping with Life's Challenges"

    13:59 Empowering Control Over Life Choices

    16:58 "Building Emotional Depth"

    19:39 Reflect on Internet Usage Patterns

    23:04 Extracurricular Sexual Activity's Impact

    27:12 Escalation of Content Tolerance

    29:19 Assessing Progression in Relationships

    32:28 Cycle of Addiction Explained

    35:54 Finding Lessons in Life's Challenges

    39:22 Revisiting Past Efforts for Success

    44:02 "Client Empowerment in Next Steps"

    46:27 Wet Dreams Podcast Disclaimer


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    47 分
  • 26. "Erectile Dysfunction: It's Bigger than your P3nis"
    2025/05/03

    In this insightful episode of the Wet Dreams Podcast, hosts Jose Gonzalez and Dr. Brad Hinman delve into the widespread issue of erectile dysfunction (ED), exploring its causes, effects, and potential solutions. The discussion highlights how ED is increasingly becoming a concern for younger men, not just older demographics. By examining both biological and psychological aspects, the hosts aim to shed light on why this condition is prevalent and its multifaceted impact on men’s lives.

    Throughout the episode, Gonzalez and Hinman emphasize the complex interplay between mental health and sexual performance. They discuss various causes of erectile dysfunction, ranging from medical and physiological issues to emotional and relational stressors. By sharing experiences from their practice, they provide valuable insights into the importance of addressing both the physical and mental health dimensions of ED. Listeners are encouraged to consider holistic approaches to treatment, such as consulting with medical professionals and exploring therapy for underlying psychological issues. This episode is crucial for anyone seeking to understand or manage erectile dysfunction more effectively.

    Timestamps

    0:29 Understanding Erectile Dysfunction in Younger Men

    8:38 Substance Effects on Sexual Performance and Mental Components

    11:48 Understanding Erectile Dysfunction and Its Psychological Factors

    19:44 Body Image and Its Impact on Male Erectile Dysfunction

    25:12 The Impact of Sexual Trauma on Intimacy and Relationships

    27:41 Complex Problem-Solving Requires Patience and Multiple Solutions

    30:01 Exploring Erectile Dysfunction and Its Impact on Relationships

    36:10 Applying Work Logic to Food and Life Decisions

    37:00 Training Techniques for Improving Erection Quality

    41:36 Mindfulness and Mental Health in Sexual Function

    44:53 Discussing Erectile Dysfunction and Seeking Professional Advice


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    46 分
  • 25. Fatherhood Unfiltered: Preparing for Babies, Emotional Health, and Nurturing Partnerships
    2025/04/21

    In this episode of the Wet Dreamz Podcast, we talk openly about what dads really go through during pregnancy and those early months of fatherhood. We shared our personal stories, highlighting the excitement, anxiety, and even feelings of being left out that often come with the territory.


    We discussed how easy it is for men to ignore their own emotions while focusing on providing for their family—something that can lead to isolation or unhealthy coping if left unchecked. Both of us emphasized the importance of communicating, not only with your partner but also with other dads who’ve been there, and having a plan to take care of your own mental health.


    Ultimately, we encouraged expectant fathers to stay engaged, reach out for support, and not to bottle up what they’re feeling during this huge transition. If you have questions or want to share your own experiences, we’d love to hear from you!

    Timestamps00:00 Preparing for Fatherhood Discussion

    05:58 Fathers' Financial Concerns and Childcare

    06:56 Task-Oriented vs. Emotional Support

    12:51 Coping Through Withdrawal and Focus

    14:04 Vulnerability to Acting Out

    17:10 Planning for Success in Challenging Times

    20:41 Unaddressed Attraction Issues Ruin Marriage

    23:35 New Fatherhood: The Need for Mentorship

    28:34 "Importance of Relationship Building"

    32:58 Expressing Men's Hidden Emotions

    34:22 Scary Birth Experience Concerns

    40:03 Bonding Essentials for New Parents

    41:27 Navigating Parenting Routines

    44:46 The Importance of Support Systems

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    47 分
  • 24. Beyond the Bedroom: The Real Impact of Sex Therapy on Mental Health
    2025/04/05

    Join us as we delve into the world of sex therapy, sharing our personal journeys and insights. Learn how our specialized training enhances therapy sessions by incorporating discussions about complex sexual issues. Discover the dynamics of sex therapy compared to conventional therapy, and explore the challenges and rewards we face as therapists. This episode offers an informative look into our profession, providing guidance for anyone considering therapy for sexual issues. Tune in for a thought-provoking conversation around the intricacies of intimacy and mental health.


    Timestamps

    0:29 Journey Into Sex Therapy: Personal Stories and Inspirations

    7:01 Becoming a Certified Sex Therapist Requires Extensive Training and Supervision

    9:15 Understanding the Unique Role of Sex Therapists in Counseling

    21:09 Challenges in Seeking Therapy for Relationship Issues

    22:14 Navigating Perceptions and Challenges as a Sex Therapist

    26:53 The Weight of Bearing Clients' Secrets and Trauma

    30:59 The Transformative Power of Therapy in Relationships and Addiction

    34:51 Exploring the Benefits and Misconceptions of Sex Therapy

    42:54 Podcast Disclaimer and Social Media Promotion


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    43 分