The Session: 5 Marks of a Biblical Marriage

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” ~ Genesis 2:24

1) Selflessness

A mark of a Godly Christian is their willingness to humble themselves and be selfless towards other. This is true especially in marriage, where we are called to be selfless to each other and put our spouses needs first. This is an effective way towards a happier marriage.

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” ~ Philippians 2:3-8

The practice of selflessness, putting each other’s needs before your own, is very difficult, because by nature we are selfish beings. However, practically speaking, many benefits arise from both husband and wife mutually prioritizing the other’s needs. When both parties make an effort to please one another by putting their needs/wants/desires first, a magical thing happens: both husband and wife are getting there needs met.

2) Good Communication

Communication within marriage can be very difficult! Wires get crossed and simple words and sentences are taken far out of context, and strife (anger intense fellowship) starts to build. We say things rashly and without thinking to our spouses, and we leave them feeling hurt and we act selfishly towards them. But God calls us to a higher standard. We are to guard our mouths (Psalm 141:3), speak wisdom (Matthew 12:36-37), be slow to speak( Ecclesiastes 5:2) {especially angry words (James 1:19)}, and learn to communicate well with our spouse.

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” ~Proverbs 15:1

Communication is critical to any relationship, and doubly so in a marriage. Having good communication with friends and family is beneficial, sure, but how much more imperative is it that you have quality communication with the person that you are one with?

3) Spiritual Emphasis (together and separately)

Our highest calling as Christians is to know God and to glorify Him.We cannot do this effectively if we are not seeking the Lord individually and as a couple. It is so vital for the life of the believer to come before God alone and study His word and worship Him (2 Timothy 3:14-17). And it is also important to come before the Lord as a couple.

If our biggest priority in life should be Christ, and our second should be our husband and family, then how can we effectively worship the Lord if we don’t worship with our family? God designed the Christian life to be lived out in community and not in solitude. God’s community is the church and this first begins at home! Strong families can make up a strong church of believers. Likewise, weak and inconsistent families will make up a weak and inconsistent congregation.

• Pray together every night before bed
• Listen to sermons together
• Discuss sermons you listen together and Sunday morning sermons
• Read books together to grow in your knowledge and worship of God
• Continually ask how you can p

To reach Tom Russell, go to https://www.heritagechristiancounselingofmansfield.com.

The Session: 4 Lessons We Can Learn about Biblical manhood from Joseph

https://www.lcbcchurch.com/articles/4-lessons-we-can-learn-from-josephs-story

Open with the Matthew account of Joseph, in Matt.1:18-24

1. Acknowledge the truth

Joseph acknowledged the truth. When we’re stuck at the bad end of someone else’s decisions, it’s all too easy to point the finger and place blame. We tend to take it a step further and cast judgement on an entire group of people when, in reality, we were only wronged by one person. If you were bullied by popular kids in middle school, for example, did you grow up seeing “all popular kids” as a threat? While these are understandable self-preservation instincts, are they actually true?

Joseph was treated unfairly by so many people – enough that he could’ve made enemies out of the whole world! Instead, we see Joseph zero in on the individuals who specifically caused him pain. He doesn’t gloss over what was done, but he has enough wisdom to look at only the situation right in front of him without painting with broad strokes.

Acknowledging the truth provided Joseph with clarity, and it can do the same for us. When we focus on what’s immediately in front of us, we can gain clarity that will help us treat our pain at the source. By recognizing the true source of our pain, we can begin the process of healing and transformation.

2. “But God”

When we’re dealing with pain – and especially when this pain is caused by someone else’s actions – it's easy for us to become angry about what we feel we don’t deserve. We become so fixated on what’s right in front of us that we don’t easily see the bigger picture.

In the midst of his trials, Joseph chose to embrace a powerful perspective shift. He turned his gaze away from his pain and toward God, saying, "But God intended it all for good." Joseph chooses to surrender and trust in a higher plan.

While it may be difficult to comprehend the purpose behind our suffering, choosing to adopt a "But God" perspective allows us to step back and acknowledge that our story is not solely defined by the hurt we've experienced. By handing our pain over to God, we open ourselves to the possibility of growth, transformation, and redemption.

3. Trust God's plan

Joseph's story shows us what it looks like to trust in God's overarching plan. While he couldn't foresee the specifics of how his pain would lead to a greater purpose, Joseph held onto the belief that God was working behind the scenes.

This step requires faith and vulnerability, as we release the need for immediate answers and outcomes. Trusting in a divine plan invites us to relinquish our desire for control and instead lean into the belief that our pain can be woven into a greater narrative that brings about good.

4. Rely on God

Joseph relied on God. If you feel like you’re about to crumble under the weight of your circumstances, know that you don’t have to keep carrying it alone. When we can’t understand what’s happening or see the bigger picture in our pain, God is ready to carry us.

Only God can bring you to the place of hope and healing you’re desperately searching for. Joseph’s story shows us that when we fix our gaze on God and choose to rely on him, even the heaviest situations can be made lighter. Remember that “God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28).

Additional Lessons

Don't expose your spouse in public

· When Joseph learned that his fiancée was pregnant, he decided to break the engagement without exposing his wife to the public (Matthew 1:19). He did not want to disgrace her and op

To reach Tom Russell, go to https://www.heritagechristiancounselingofmansfield.com.

The Session-Help For Boomerang Parents-Potential Benefits From Being a Boomerang Child, from Focus On The Family, FaithFI and others

I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:5.

In July 2020, 52% of young adults in the US resided with one or both of their parents, according to a Pew Research Center analysis – the highest percentage the United States has seen since the end of the Great Depression.

National Longitudinal Study Of Youth 1997

Found: The evidence that mental health and economic characteristics were related to home leaving and returning. Emotional distress was associated with earlier exits from, and returns to, the parental home; alcohol problems were associated with earlier returns to the parental home. The findings regarding economic resources were unexpectedly mixed. Greater economic resources were linked to delayed exits from, and earlier returns to, the parental home. The implications of these findings for young adults are discussed.

Key aspects of Christian help for boomerang parents:

• Prayer and Spiritual Warfare: Praying for the child's well-being, direction, and maturity, and seeking God's wisdom in navigating the situation. This includes praying for the parent's patience, grace, and ability to discern God's will.
• Biblical Principles: Applying biblical principles regarding family dynamics, obedience, respect, and financial responsibility. This may include encouraging the child to work towards financial independence and setting boundaries within the household.
• Open Communication and Setting Expectations: Having open and honest conversations about expectations, roles, and responsibilities within the household. This may involve discussing financial contributions, chores, and rules for the home.
• Fostering Independence: Encouraging the child to pursue their own goals, whether it's career advancement or personal development. This may involve supporting their efforts to find employment, complete education, or seek financial independence.
• Seeking God's Guidance: Recognizing that God's ways are often higher than our own and trusting in His timing and plan. This includes surrendering the situation to God and trusting in His love and provision.
• Turning to God's Word: Seeking wisdom and guidance from God's word (the Bible) for navigating the unique challenges of a boomerang situation. This can help parents find comfort and reassurance.
• Family Counseling: Consider seeking guidance from a Christian counselor or mentor who can provide support and equip the family to navigate the situation.
• Community Support: Connecting with other parents who have experienced similar situations through support groups or online communities can provide encouragement and practical advice.

Practical Steps for Boomerang Parents:

1. Establish Clear Boundaries: Set expectations for the child's role in the household, including chores, financial contributions, and responsibilities.

2. Encourage Financial Responsibility: Help the child develop a budget, find employment, and work towards financial independence.

3. Communicate Openly and Respectfully: Have regular check-ins with the child to discuss progress, address concerns, and build understanding.

4. Pray Regularly: Pray for the child's well-being, direction, and maturity, and for the family's ability to navigate the situation with grace and patience.

5. Seek God's Wisdom: Turn to God's Word for guidance and strength, and trust in His timing and plan for the situation.

Potential Benefits From Being a Boomerang Child, from Jenna Ab

To reach Tom Russell, go to https://www.heritagechristiancounselingofmansfield.com.