Are narcissists born or made? In this foundational episode, we unpack the complex roots of narcissism through the lens of both nature and nurture. We explore how temperament, early childhood environment, and relational trauma interact to shape narcissistic behaviors — and why it’s not always a direct path.

You’ll learn:

• How biological traits like sensitivity or the need for validation can become liabilities in emotionally unsafe environments

• Why narcissism is often a learned survival strategy — and not always from overtly abusive parenting

• That not everyone raised in a narcissistic home becomes a narcissist — and some narcissists weren’t raised by narcissists at all

• How to understand the difference between narcissistic traits and full-blown personality disorder

• Why the origins of someone’s narcissism don’t excuse the harm they cause — and what that means for your healing

Whether you’re still in the relationship or long out, this episode offers clarity, validation, and direction. Because you don’t have to figure this out alone. And understanding the “why” helps you stop taking on the impossible task of fixing it.

Why is it so hard to leave — even when you know the relationship is toxic?

In this powerful episode, we expose the hidden truth behind trauma bonding with a covert narcissist. It’s not just emotional confusion — it’s chemical addiction. You’re not addicted to the person; you’re addicted to the highs, the relief, the dopamine rush that follows emotional chaos. And while you're chasing connection, they’re chasing something else entirely: your Fix-It Mode.

We’ll break down the neuroscience of trauma bonding, explore why your empathy is being exploited, and uncover why the narcissist needs to keep collapsing — just to keep you engaged. This isn’t love. It’s survival mode.

If you’ve ever felt trapped in the cycle of emotional whiplash — adored one moment, blamed the next — this episode will help you see the pattern for what it is… and finally begin to break free.

If you’ve been bending over backwards trying to fix a relationship that keeps breaking you… this episode is for you.

Today, I’m sharing a personal story about the moment I was asked a question that stopped me in my tracks: “Can you honestly say you’ve done everything you know to do?” That one question made me face the truth — not about the relationship, but about how much of myself I had been pouring into something that couldn’t be repaired by effort alone.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why survivors of covert narcissistic abuse try so hard to fix what isn’t fixable

• How over-functioning keeps us stuck in one-sided emotional labor

• What “giving it your all” really means — and what it doesn’t

• The illusion of the “one right book, podcast, or article” that will finally make them change

• The moment you realize you’ve done enough — even if they never did

• How to stop proving your pain and start honoring your healing

You don’t have to wait until you’re completely broken to say, “That’s enough.”
You’re allowed to stop trying when your trying is costing you your peace, your clarity, and your self-worth.

If you find yourself dreading the weekend and breathing easier on Monday mornings, you might be living in the upside-down world of covert narcissistic abuse.

In this powerful episode, we explore what it’s like to live with a covert narcissist whose presence turns weekends into emotional minefields. While others relax and recharge, you're managing moods, walking on eggshells, and just trying to make it through.

We’ll walk through the emotional rhythm of the week — from the sweet relief of Monday morning to the quiet panic of Friday afternoons — and explain why this backwards cycle is not only real, but a key sign of emotional abuse.

You'll also learn a simple but transformative mindset tool I teach my clients called “popcorn moments” — a way to regain your sanity by observing the chaos instead of getting pulled into it.

Are they a covert narcissist—or are they just being a jerk?
That’s one of the most common (and most confusing) questions I hear from clients and listeners. In this episode of the Covert Narcissism Podcast, we break down real-life examples of those cutting, guilt-laced, or backhanded comments that leave you wondering: Was that emotional abuse, passive-aggressive manipulation, or just a bad moment?

From relationship red flags like “Must be nice to have that kind of freedom”, to parental guilt trips like “After all I’ve done for you…”, we’ll look at how to spot the signs of covert narcissism versus everyday jerk behavior.

You’ll learn how to recognize emotional invalidation, gaslighting, guilt trips, and passive-aggressive abuse—and how to tell when it’s a manipulative pattern instead of a one-off mistake.
If you’ve been left second-guessing your reality, feeling invisible or emotionally punished, this episode will help you find clarity.

Ever walk away from a conversation feeling more confused than when you started—like somehow, even though you were calm, kind, and clear, you’re the one apologizing again?

Welcome to the maddening world of circular conversations with a covert narcissist.

In this episode, we dive into the logic-defying, soul-draining dynamics that keep you stuck in emotional loops—where nothing gets resolved, the goalposts always move, and your reality is constantly twisted. Before you even had the words “covert narcissism,” you probably felt it: the confusion, the guilt, the slow erasure of your clarity and confidence.

You’ll hear a dramatized conversation that shows how these patterns unfold, how covert narcissists derail resolution, and what gaslighting really sounds like behind closed doors. More importantly, we’ll explore how to step out of the spiral—with grounded examples, boundary-setting phrases, and reminders that you’re not crazy. You’re being manipulated.

If you’re tired of talking in circles and ready to reclaim your peace, this one’s for you.

In this episode of the Covert Narcissism Podcast, we take a much-needed breath of fresh air—literally and emotionally.

If I weren’t talking about covert narcissism every week, I’d be out in the woods learning survival skills: building fires, navigating with moss, and figuring out which berries won’t kill me. Why? Because sometimes, healing from covert narcissistic abuse means taking a step back to reconnect with who you are outside the trauma.

This episode is your invitation to pause the obsessive thoughts about the covert narcissist, stop decoding emotional abuse for just a moment, and remember what it feels like to simply be you.

We’ll explore:

• Why it’s essential to take breaks during narcissistic abuse recovery
• How constantly thinking about narcissism can keep you stuck
• What stepping back does for your nervous system, your identity, and your healing
• A fun peek into what I’d be doing if I weren’t talking about emotional abuse every week

What if the guilt you’ve been carrying… isn’t guilt at all? In this episode of the Covert Narcissism Podcast, we peel back the layers of false guilt—those heavy, painful feelings that whisper “you’re the problem” anytime someone else is upset. Renee walks through a real-life example of emotional coercion in a relationship with a covert narcissist, showing how guilt is often a disguise for fear, shame, and manipulated responsibility.
You'll learn how to recognize the difference between true guilt and emotional control, how to reframe the heartbreak we mistakenly label as wrongdoing, and why survivors of covert abuse so often confuse love with self-erasure.
If you’ve ever canceled your joy, dimmed your light, or questioned your own goodness just to avoid someone’s disapproval—this episode is for you.