In this episode, Andrey and Adam unpack the deep connection between attachment styles and personality disorders. Together, they explore how childhood trauma, neurological stress, and emotional dysregulation contribute to avoidant, anxious, and disorganized attachment—and how these patterns can evolve into more severe conditions like borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, and even schizophrenia. Adam challenges the medical model, offering hopeful insights on healing, brain health, and the possibility of recovery without relying solely on medication.

✨ Topics Covered ✨ 👉 The difference between attachment styles and personality disorders 👉 How avoidant behaviors can be self-protective—or damaging 👉 The impact of early childhood trauma on long-term attachment 👉 Why the medical model often mislabels people as “broken” 👉 How avoidant attachment differs from avoidant personality disorder 👉 The trauma roots of borderline personality disorder (BPD) 👉 The connection between high-performance households and emotional suppression 👉 What’s really happening in the brain during bipolar disorder 👉 The dangers of overmedication and brain inflammation 👉 Why even schizophrenia can be helped through functional systems 👉 Finland’s powerful approach to treating schizophrenia without meds 👉 How social bonding and oxytocin lead to brain healing 👉 Why chronic stress blocks your potential—and how attachment healing unlocks it 👉 A powerful metaphor about “loving a crocodile” and staying in unsafe emotional patterns

Healing from childhood trauma—especially when it starts as early as age 6—takes courage, patience, and truth. If this conversation helped you feel seen or understood, consider sharing it with someone who’s walking a similar path. You’re not alone—and there’s real hope for healing and freedom.

Stay tuned for more expert insights and relationship advice in future episodes! If you enjoyed this episode, you will probably love our episode titled ‘Attachment Specialist Fixes an Avoidant Woman’ https://youtu.be/zSaZrRedRUc

Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://iwishyouknew.show/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow Snapchat: https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod Twitter /X: https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809

-------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith Threads: https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro

-------------------------------------------------

The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.

Visit: https://iwishyouknew.show/ to lean more about the podcast

To Learn More About @AttachmentAdam

https://adamlanesmith.com/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/?hl=en

In this episode, Evan Marc Katz joins Adam Lane Smith for a fiery and thought-provoking debate on one of the most challenging questions in relationships: Can we truly change our partner—or is it all about accepting them as they are? From practical dating strategies to deeper emotional dynamics, this conversation dives into the complexities of modern love and long-term compatibility.

✨ Key Topics Covered: 👉 Can good relationships be effortless—or do they always require "hard work"? 👉 Why trying to filter a future husband through dating profiles might be sabotaging your chances 👉 The hidden danger of rushing relationships due to urgency or age 👉 Do men doing more chores really lead to higher divorce rates? 👉 Why chemistry fades—and what truly keeps couples together long-term 👉 Understanding attachment styles: anxious vs. avoidant in real-life dynamics 👉 How discomfort can be a sign of growth in a healthy relationship 👉 Can emotionally avoidant men become devoted, secure partners? 👉 The power of conflict resolution and reading emotional cues 👉 What makes two people truly compatible—beyond cliches

Whether you're single and searching or in the middle of navigating a tough dynamic, this conversation offers powerful insights into love, growth, and emotional responsibility. To dive deeper into relationship skills, check out Adam's retreat offerings at https://adamlanesmith.com/retreat/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=avoidant&utm_content=descriptionlink

Stay tuned for more expert insights and relationship advice in future episodes! If you enjoyed this episode, you will probably love our episode titled ‘Attachment Specialist Fixes an Avoidant Woman’ https://youtu.be/zSaZrRedRUc

Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://iwishyouknew.show/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow Snapchat: https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod Twitter /X: https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809

-------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith Threads: https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro

-------------------------------------------------- Evan Marc Katz: -------------------------------------------------- IG: https://www.instagram.com/realevanmarckatz/?hl=en Website: https://www.evanmarckatz.com/

The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.

Visit: https://iwishyouknew.show/ to lean more about the podcast

To Learn More About @AttachmentAdam

https://adamlanesmith.com/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/?hl=en

Brandon Doerkse opens up about how he nearly lost his marriage due to emotional numbness, distraction, and addiction. For years, he struggled with avoidance, failing to recognize how his actions were eroding the trust and intimacy in his relationship. It wasn’t until he hit rock bottom that he realized the painful truth—his marriage was falling apart, and he was the one responsible.

Topics Covered: 👉 The impact of emotional disconnection in marriage 👉 How avoidance and addiction sabotage relationships 👉 Why men must take the first step in healing a broken relationship 👉 Understanding attachment styles and their effect on marriage 👉 The painful realization that led Brandon to transformation 👉 How honesty and accountability helped rebuild trust 👉 The importance of integration with God, family, and self 👉 What true masculine leadership in marriage looks like

Brandon’s journey proves that no matter how broken a relationship may seem, healing is possible when a man is willing to confront his shortcomings and take responsibility. His story is a powerful testament to the importance of emotional awareness, faith, and intentional action in restoring love and trust.

If this conversation spoke to you, share your thoughts in the comments. Have you faced similar struggles in your relationship? What steps have helped you move forward? Let’s continue the conversation below.

Stay tuned for more expert insights and relationship advice in future episodes! If you enjoyed this episode, you will probably love our episode titled ‘Attachment Specialist Fixes an Avoidant Woman’ https://youtu.be/zSaZrRedRUc

Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://iwishyouknew.show/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow Snapchat: https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod Twitter /X: https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809

-------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/ Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith Threads: https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro

-------------------------------------------------- Brandon Doerkse: -------------------------------------------------- IG: https://www.instagram.com/brandontalksmarriage/?hl=en Threads: https://www.threads.net/@brandontalksmarriage

The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.

Visit: https://iwishyouknew.show/ to lean more about the podcast

To Learn More About @AttachmentAdam

https://adamlanesmith.com/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/?hl=en