This week I’m diving into the crucial differences between what’s real and what’s fantasy, especially when it comes to our kids' exposure to pornography. It’s a topic that’s tough to talk about, but we can't ignore the fact that most children will encounter explicit content by the age of 11, with some even younger. This reality makes it all the more essential for us as parents to understand these distinctions so we can guide our children.

One of the concepts I explore is the erotic equation: attraction plus obstacle equals excitement. This formula is often exploited by the porn industry, which normalises fantasies that have little to do with real-life intimacy. Without our input, children might start to think that what they see on a screen is what sex is really like, leading to confusion and potentially harmful behaviour as they grow.

I’m urging parents to open up conversations about what’s real and what’s fantasy—breaking down the images and ideas they might come across online and putting them into context. These aren’t one-off talks; they’re ongoing dialogues that help our children distinguish between healthy sexuality and unrealistic portrayals.

My goal in this episode is to encourage you to build communication bridges with your kids. By fostering trust and openness, we can help them develop a healthy understanding of their own sexuality and navigate relationships with clarity. It’s not about shutting down curiosity; it’s about guiding it, ensuring they feel safe to ask questions and explore their feelings without shame.

Let's work together to be that guiding light in our children’s lives.

About Janet:
Janet is an Intimacy Coach & Relationship Therapist based in the UK. She helps individuals & couples of any gender identity or sexual orientation achieve deeper levels of relational intimacy.

Janet trains healthcare professionals with her Sex Talk Education curriculum to manage Harmful Sexualised Behaviour. As a former teacher, she believes education is crucial for the development of relationships and personal protection for both adults and children.

Janet's work is influenced by her experiences as an adoptee & being an unexpected partner of a sex & porn addict (compulsive user).

Janet has worked as a Child Counsellor in primary schools, adult counsellor at Alder Hey Hospital (Staff Clients and child bereaved parents) and a School Safeguarding Supervisor.

Janet Simpson MBACP (Accred.), PGCE, BSc. (Hons) Counselling Adults & Couples, Child Counselling (Cert), Psychosexual (Cert)

FIND ME: https://www.linktr.ee/janetsimpson

FOLLOW ME: Instagram: @janet.eileen.simpson

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/janet-eileen-simpson-104b15149/