What if you only had one year to live? It might sound like a terrifying thought—but for many of my clients, this question became the unexpected key to calming their anxiety, shifting their priorities, and living with greater clarity and peace.

In this episode, I’ll share real-life stories of clients who broke out of fear, stress, and relationship tension by asking themselves this single question. You’ll hear how it helped them stop people-pleasing, become more present, transform difficult family dynamics, and move toward passions that had long been buried under anxiety.

We’ll explore:

• Why imagining limited time doesn’t create more anxiety—it relieves it
• How urgency can awaken courage, gratitude, and purpose
• The surprising psychological shift from cyclical to linear time
• And how you can use this question to realign your own life right now

Timestamps:

00:30 – Intro: The counterintuitive question that calms anxiety
00:59 – A client overwhelmed by work, school, and divorce finds clarity
02:35 – How the question creates courage and unblocks passions
03:14 – Meet Sadie: Constant future-stress and why she couldn’t rest
06:12 – Jim’s struggle: Family tension and values clashes
08:45 – Carrie’s story: Parents, boundaries, and a surprising twist
12:02 – You don’t actually have forever: 4,000 weeks
12:52 – Linear time vs. cyclical time—and why this matters for anxiety
16:00 – Kindness Narrative: Support After a Four Wheeler Accident

Submit Your Kindness Narrative:

Share a moment of kindness that moved you or changed you. Email your story (written or audio) to calmyourcaveman@gmail.com or DM me on Instagram @CalmYourCaveman.

For full show notes, including resources mentioned, go to https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/start-becoming-who-you-want-to-be—now

Think you’ve got a good handle on what’s dangerous? Take my three-question quiz in this episode and prepare to be surprised.

Join me as we unpack:

• Why your brain is wired to overestimate rare threats
• How news and social media manipulate your attention with the "triple threat" formula: Negative, Novel, and Emotional
• How relentless exposure to worst-case scenarios is subtly programming you to live in defense mode.

But don’t worry—You’ll also learn:

• How to “retrain” your brain to perceive the world more accurately
• Why consuming news is like eating dessert (and what your psychological vegetables should be)
• Simple practices that can reset your emotional baseline and lower chronic anxiety

Time Stamps

00:30 – Welcome + Risk Quiz
01:15 – Quiz Answers Revealed
03:15 – Media’s Attention-Trap: Negativity + Novelty + Emotion
09:30 – How Your Unconscious Brain Predicts the Future
15:00 – How Feeding Your Memory Affects Your Perception of Risk
18:10 – Mental Junk-Food vs. Mental Vegetables
22:19 – Kindness Narrative: A Kind Airline Pilot

For full show notes, including resources mentioned, go to https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/why-your-brain-thinks-the-world-is-scarier-than-it-is

What if a simple “hello” could rewire your anxious brain? In this surprising and science-backed episode, we explore how speaking to strangers—yes, even if you're an introvert—can shift your unconscious emotional default from fear to connection. Learn why weak social ties matter, how your brain rewrites its threat narratives, and how living in Brazil changed my personal relationship with everyday interactions. This episode is packed with practical, research-based advice for gradually training your brain to feel safer in the world, one small interaction at a time.

What You’ll Learn:

• How simple social interactions shift brain chemistry
• Real-life introvert stories (including mine!)
• How to gamify your exposure to small talk and feel better doing it
• The cultural contrast that rewired my perspective on strangers

Timestamps:

00:30 – Welcome back & a quick refresher on the "iceberg" model
03:07 – Today’s surprising strategy: Rewiring Anxiety Through Micro-Connections
04:09 – But what if I’m an introvert? (Spoiler: it still works)
05:23 – Real-life story: my introverted friend and the lab job that changed her
07:14 – My past: how I used to avoid every interaction
9:02 – Moving to Brazil: the culture shift that forced me to connect
12:23 – Beach buddies & micro-moments of belonging
14:18 – Why this works: rewiring your emotional defaults
16:13 – Start small: make it a game and track your wins
18:44 – Kindness narrative: help with a family tragedy

For full show notes, including resources mentioned, go to https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/you’re-not-anti-social,-you’re-under-exposed

What if your great-grandparents held the key to calming your anxiety? In this episode, we explore a surprising, research-backed strategy for influencing your unconscious brain: knowing your family's intergenerational stories. Discover how ancestral narratives can help shift your brain's default stress response from threat to challenge, enhancing resilience, emotional health, and self-efficacy. Through deeply personal family stories, you'll learn how to train your brain—like a beloved pet—to respond more supportively in the face of uncertainty. If you've ever wondered how to influence your emotional responses at the subconscious level, this episode is a must-listen.

00:30 – Why it's hard to "just decide" to feel better
03:45 – Training the brain like a dog: Influence, not control
05:10 – Why intergenerational stories reduce anxiety and boost resilience
07:36 – Story #1: Great-grandpa Rue Tyler’s banjo band in the Great Depression
13:29 – Story #2: Great-great-grandmother Charlotte’s years of mercury poisoning
16:27 – Modeling and inherited resilience: From “Why me?” to “How do I do this?”
17:23 – How to collect your family stories
21:25 – Kindness Narrative: Hospitality to strange travellers

For full shownotes, including resources mentioned, go to: https://www.calmyourcaveman.com

Waking up already overwhelmed? In this episode, we unpack why morning anxiety hits hard—and how to shift from panic to strategy. Drawing from neuroscience, childhood memory, and a dash of board game strategy, we explore what it takes to reclaim mental ground and lead from strength, even when you feel like hiding under the covers.

You’ll learn:

• Why your anxiety might spike in the early morning
• How applying a “game mindset” can help you work with your real-life resources
• How to create a realistic, compassionate sense of daily accomplishment
• And what a “Yay Me” paragraph can do to rewire your internal reward system

Timestamps:

00:30 Introduction and Childhood Fears: Feeling Small
03:45 My Adult Morning Anxiety
05:55 The Catan Strategy for Managing Morning Anxiety
11:30 Yay Me Paragraph
12:19 Why Making "Game Rules" For Life Reduces Anxiety
16:44 Kindness Narrative: Kindness From a Stranger in Albania

For full shownotes, including resources mentioned, go to: https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/how-to-stop-waking-up-already-overwhelmed

Do you ever feel like life is one long stream of stress, uncertainty, and potential disaster? What if your brain is simply missing half the story? In this episode of Calm Your Caveman, we dive into the concept of serendipities—those unlikely, yet powerfully beneficial events that seem too timely to be coincidence. Drawing on the work of psychologist Scott Peck (The Road Less Traveled), we explore how noticing serendipities can actually rewire your negativity bias and reduce anxiety.

Topics Covered:
• What serendipities are and why they matter
• How our brains filter out good events (and fixate on bad ones)
• How to train your brain to notice life’s helpful coincidences

Tune in to learn how to:
• Loosen anxiety’s grip by shifting your mental focus
• See challenges as workable, not catastrophic
• Invite hope, trust, and creative solutions back into your awareness

Timestamps
00:30 – What Are Serendipities?
01:32 – 4 Serendipity Stories
11:30 – Why We Miss Serendipities
14:48 – Training Your Brain to See Possibilities, Not Just Threats
17:31 – Kindness Narrative: A Friendship For Hard Times

For full episode, including resources mentioned, go to: For full episode, including resources mentioned, go to: https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/rewire-your-negativity-bias-with-serendipities

Don't forget to submit your kindness narrative! Your story could inspire someone else.
Send your Kindness Narrative (audio or written) to:
•Email: CalmYourCaveman@gmail.com
•Instagram DM: @CalmYourCaveman
(You can stay completely anonymous if you prefer!)

Music:
J.S. Bach, Goldberg Variations, Transcribed for String Trio (excerpts). Performed by Avery Ensemble live 12/2/2017. Used by permission.

Harmonia Artificioso-Ariosa, Partita No. 4 in E flat Major (excerpts). Performed by the Avery Ensemble, recorded 2017. Used by permission.

Adult kids = adult worries. If you’ve been stuck in an anxiety loop, today’s episode is your lifeline.

What You'll Learn:
•Why parenting adult children can trigger more anxiety than other stages
•Four mindset shifts to focus on when worry strikes
•A simple writing exercise to reframe parental anxiety
•How to trust your children’s journey—even when it looks messy

Timestamps:
[00:00:30] – Parenting adult children and anxiety traps
[00:02:57] – Shifting focus: What kind of parent do I want to be?
[00:05:11] – Transitioning from "problem solver" to "observer"
[00:08:31] – Exercise: Rewriting anxious narratives into trusting stories
[00:11:46] – Mistakes as a parent: Repair, commitment, and resilience
[00:12:47] – Conclusion: Investing in what you can control
[00:15:05] – Today's Kindness Narrative: A math teacher’s lasting impact

For full episode, including resources mentioned, go to: https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/when-you-can't-fix-it:-four-ways-to-calm-anxiety-about-adult-children

Share Your Story:
Send your Kindness Narrative (audio or written) to:
•Email: CalmYourCaveman@gmail.com
•Instagram DM: @CalmYourCaveman
(You can stay completely anonymous if you prefer!)

Music:
J.S. Bach, Goldberg Variations, Transcribed for String Trio (excerpts). Performed by Avery Ensemble live 12/2/2017. Used by permission.
Harmonia Artificioso-Ariosa, Partita No. 4 in E flat Major (excerpts). Performed by the Avery Ensemble, recorded 2017. Used by permission.
More information at https://www.averyensemble.com/

This episode starts with a conversation with my mom, who has spent a lifetime quietly serving others and finding real joy in it. But for me, giving didn’t always bring peace — it often brought guilt, pressure, and anxiety. If service is supposed to make us happier, why can it sometimes feel so heavy? I open up about my own dysfunctional relationship with giving, how it was harming rather than helping, and what finally shifted. Learn the two major blocks that might be keeping you from experiencing the mental health benefits of kindness — and how to turn giving into a powerful, joyful tool for emotional healing.

00:30 – Welcome & Introduction
00:52 – My Mom’s Service and What She Gains From It
9:19 – When Service Becomes a Burden
10:58 – The Global Science of Kindness
12:29 – Learning to Put My Oxygen Mask on First
16:09 – Choice vs Obligation in Service
21:56 – Kindness Narrative: Making a Support Fund

For full episode, including resources mentioned, go to: https://www.calmyourcaveman.com/episodes/when-giving-backfires:-healing-the-anxiety-of-overgiving

Music:
J.S. Bach, Goldberg Variations, Transcribed for String Trio (excerpts). Performed by Avery Ensemble live 12/2/2017. Used by permission.
To see original performance go to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TELZsL_5W2c

Harmonia Artificioso-Ariosa, Partita No. 4 in E flat Major (excerpts). Performed by the Avery Ensemble, recorded 2017. Used by permission. To stream recording go to: https://music.apple.com/br/album/mozart-biber-creston-schoenfield/1373331850?l=en-GB

More information at https://www.averyensemble.com/