It is never easy for you to go through heartbreak.

You don't know what do you .. where to turn ... how to be.

Well ... your answer is right here!

The way all of us can get to the ultimate level of joy and optimal happiness is if we tend to our hurt.

Cuts need care. Wounds need to be treated. Your heart is no different.

Before any lesson can be administered - this is the first step to your 'new day' and 'new you.'

This is how ... you heal ... from heartbreak ... forever!

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It is well known that divorce is like a death on earth. You go through a grieving process. However, to say "get over divorce," it sounds callous, harsh and cruel.

This episode explains the title of the podcast. Divorce is a stigma. You get through the pain. In order to get to a better place in life, you must get over all the generalizations of it. You have permission to rip off the scarlet letter 'D' for divorce ... forever!

Cole candidly talks about the moment he realized divorce wore him like a cloak. Just like being 'under the weather', he was 'under the influence of divorce'. He also mentions the moment he made his way out of that stigma - and into the better life which still lay before him.

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• Divorce’s Problems with Social Stigmas
• The Divorcée Stigma That's Alive and Well
• Divorce Without Shame

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• Spiritual cul-de-sac: How the church fails the divorced
• Dealing with Guilt, Shame, and Social Stigma of Divorce
• The Stigma of Being a Divorced Christian Woman

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - Psalm 73:26

Download your copy of the FREE audio How To Heal From Heartbreak now!

All music by - Cxdy

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Going into a death spiral after matrimony is not an easy decision to make. It should never be taken lightly. In fact, divorcee-to-be, your life will never be the same should you go through with marriage dissolution.

Before you enter the realm of separation, think it over ... and over .. and over. Do everything you van to avoid going through a divorce. If you see a way to resolve your marriage, please take the opportunity to do so.

Cole expresses his journey in entering a world where loneliness became an everyday companion. Divorce is not for the weak, and whenever anyone mentions the possibility, this is his first piece of advice he offers every single time.

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• A good reason to think twice ...
• Slowing down and thinking twice about divorce
• Here's ... what to think about before divorce

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• 5 tips for Christians considering divorce
• Why you shouldn't give up on your marriage
• To a spouse considering divorce

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - Ephesians 4:32

Download your copy of the FREE audio How To Heal From Heartbreak now!

All music by - Cxdy

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So ... you made that decision to separate. Your world of debating over assets, blame, events of the now-former union and sanity now begins.

And we haven't gotten to the biggest collateral damage whenever divorce happens ... children. Innocent figures almost overnight turn into bargaining chips between two people who are no longer in love with each other.

Every divorcee goes through the raw, unrelenting process of pain. You experience a death on earth, and Cole describes his moment in great detail. The most beautiful part about experiencing death on earth ... is there is life after death!

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• Death or divorce: Which is worse?
• 5 crappy things you need to feel ...
• Divorce is like death without the support or rituals

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• With Christ, you can overcome the pain of divorce
• 12 steps for overcoming the pain of divorce
• The devastating effects of divorce

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - Ezekiel 18:32

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All music by - Cxdy

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One of the greatest tools known to a divorcee is never discussed. Considering the volatile state you are undergoing, being away from others is a good thing. No, scratch that. It's a great thing.

Going through any journey alone is never fun. However, it sometimes is necessary. this is when you can gather your thoughts, lick your wounds, and - most importantly - learn who you truly are.

Cole speaks about the times that he needed to undergo being alone in order to be a better friend, mate and man to society, at large. It was a tricky tightrope for him, but he expresses how he navigated his way through it.

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• Being alone after divorce ...
• Living alone after divorce
• How I overcame my fear of being alone

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• Choosing singleness after divorce is a good thing
• Beautiful truths every divorced Christian needs to know
• God has a purpose for your painful divorce

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - 1 Samuel 12:22

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All music by - Cxdy

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This is where it gets tricky. Treacherous waters are ahead - because, quite frankly, you are being a liability too those you love. If you don't watch out, you may alienate them for the rest of your life.

Many people feel like they are pawns in the huge chess game of life. Either they serve your purpose as your personal Amen Corner ... or they serve as a huge distraction when you aren't ready to hear the truth come out of their mouths about your erratic (and hurtful) behavior.

This is where Cole gets with you and mentions the ways we all use other human beings (parents, friends, co-workers, associates ... and most importantly, children) to advance your personal gain of masking the pain that still resides within you. He knows ... because he's been there.

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• When children become pawns
• Ways you're using your children as pawns
• Things divorced parents should do to avoid screwing up their children

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• Co-Parenting with an ex: Advocate or adversary?
• When hate comes before children
• Don't pawn the children

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - Matthew 7:15

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All music by - Cxdy

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You've cut yourself. You've fallen to the ground. You've accidentally slammed your hand in your car door. All those scenarios hurt ... but not like being rejected by someone you love.

There is something profoundly different about healing from a divorce. Healing from a break-up is bad enough. Literally seeing your family, your existence, your life split in two ... can prove to be devastating.

Cole walks you through the time when he recognized that divorce is something you can't simply brush aside and move forward. He mentions the time when the pain was so unbearable - the feeling of death felt better than the excruciating pain of being discarded.

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• Emotional coping and divorce
• Reasons the pain of divorce is hard to get over
• Why divorce hurts

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• God is able to heal the pain of divorce
• Divorce: Will this pain ever go away?
• Healing the wounds of divorce

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - Revelation 21:4

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All music by - Cxdy

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"I hate you." "You disgust me." "I wish you were never born." "You need to die." All of these words you either have heard at one time or another ... or have said them - maybe even both. The feeling is hate. However, what if we were to tell you that it is normal for you to feel this way?

Of course, it's not something you should forever want to feel. However, when discourse happens - intense feelings start to develop. And what better (or worse) to feel - than hate.

Cole talks about the time he mentions this in counsel - and in conversation with his ex-wife as he goes through the unflinchingly painful ordeal of being emotional in the beginning of divorce. He had to understand the hatred - so he could ultimately destroy it.

Many thanks to the following resources for aiding in the production of this episode:

OFF THE TOP ... ARTICLES

• Why is it OK to be angry at your ex?
• Feeling hatred is normal in divorce
• 5 simple ways to deal with anger during a divorce

SPIRITUAL CONNECTION LITERATURE

• What the Bible says about anger (after divorce)
• Demystifying your anger during divorce
• How could God let this happen?

EPISODE SCRIPTURE - Proverbs 8:13

Download your copy of the FREE audio How To Heal From Heartbreak now!

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All music by - Cxdy

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